System of a down, yo I’m never a downer,
Spin dross into gold, I’m a smart dumbfounderer.
Don’t flounder for syllables, I flay and fillet
Make a surgical strike, write like Edna St Vincent Millay.
Baywatch guest star I did me a cameo,
Pamela Anderson looking good in some camo.
Me and Hasselhoff we sprechen sie Deutschen,
No more rolling in Corollas boy, now I’m Rolls Roycin’.
Boysenberry no longer, got my man sap flowin’,
Plant my seeds in rows but these weeds some need ho-in’.
Put your North Face on, I bring it like Peter North,
Bottle this pop, pink champagne’s getting’ uncorked.
Horked up a hairball the size of Secaucus, Peter
Tork took the fork in the road, it’s gettin’ raucous.
A mawkish interlude: don’t fear the reaper, but
Pretty soon dude we’re worm food all the Golden Gate leapers
will get eaten by sharks, I’m-a start getting snarky
With the next fool who calls me the next Marky Mark,
Me myself and I come in three different colors:
Red, gold, black and green.