Full can of Fix-a-Flat

I’m flat broke but I’m fixing to fix that,
Got me a monkey wrench and a full can of Fix-a-Flat.
Gonna do some damage, got a bad case of mange
I’m ready to share with y’all, feeling deranged.

Froth at the mouth but no frothy Santorum mix
Ix-nay butt play, squeal like a pig, bunch of hicks
tried to convince me the world is flat,
I said no, It’s a cube, dude, on the back of a giant rat.

I saw some sneaking through the alley with Sally,
Chicago mammals they big, I took me a tally.
Counted to 10 but could’ve been more,
Couldn’t get my socks off to count 10 more.

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6 thoughts on “Full can of Fix-a-Flat

      1. “Sneakin’ Sally Through The Alley.” Early Robert Palmer, before he got all “Power chords and suits in front of excessively-lipsticked, bored models.” Shoot. Thought it was on purpose. I probably don’t win anything now, do I.

        Like

      2. No, actually you win an award for correcting my error: I thought that was a Stevie Wonder song, not Robert Palmer. Quite a sea change from his later oeuvre, indeed!

        So… (drum roll)… You have been nominated for the Most Perspiring Blogger Award! Enjoy, and please accept this complimentary towel (no really, please)…

        Like

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