Floetry in potion: Get you a notion of this, just a sip;
no commotion, smooth like baby lotion and Hennessey,
cures lisps, fits you out for crown and scepter,
plays Clarice to your Hannibal Lecter, spins hits like Phil Spector.
— Wait, don’t expectorate yet! There’s (not unexpectedly) more —
Give bullies what-for, riposte with le mot juste,
Proustian powers at your fingertips, mais oui!
Conjure up amour fou, Pepe Le Pew style
Smile mildly as they go all Jerry Lewis on your ass.
(I love the French–they have that certain, how do you say, menage-a-trois.)